i went to dixons and bought “under construction” by missy elliott, because i wanted to remind myself how kick ass she is…

“under construction” is the album containing “gossip folks” and “work it”. more high profile guest rappers than, like, a high profile guest rapper convention. i’d never heard the full album - only the singles really - so little did i realise that she basically yaks the whole way through it, there’s intros, skits, interludes, outros, whatever. its so good to hear her pop in and out and explain herself, do obligatory roll-calls and shout-outs and just generally crack wise:

why there aren’t more artist voiceover on records i’ll never know. or like a commentary track you can turn on and off, like on a dvd? is this some super audio cd or blu-ray feature or something yet? surely. surely the eagles would do it. surely the eagles have done it. i’d do it, except that my voice has been proven to be a major cause of ear cancer

MISSY ELLIOTT RULES!!!:

i also bought three custard records. i figure if i’m going to become a custard evangelist, i better start getting to know my stuff. its funny how dixons and polyester are practically across the road from each other in fitzroy - going into polyester, especially when its full, the record store kind of vibrates with excitement and just some kind of general vibe, like music lives there or something. dixons (its a second hand record store for you, out-of-towners) is like where cds goes to die or something, pudgy white dudes picking through the cd racks like vultures picking through a carcass. trying to find the meaty bits. no-one looks each other in the eye. the store just feels grey, like in the care bears movie when the villains steal all the color and everyone just goes dull and lifeless. scared the shit out of me as a kid.

ok so i’m giving dixons a really bad wrap when instead they are really a melbourne institution. while i was there, of course, i had to look under F, couldn’t help it. and sure enough, there it was - a copy of the changes ep sitting there, looking pretty untouched, probably a promo copy that went the wrong way to someone who couldn’t care less about faux pas - thats a kinder way of looking at it than to think that someone has actually bought it, hated it, and sold it again for a mere $3 or whatever! i often wonder what it feels like to go to a second hand store and see your own cds in the bargain bin. and now i know! it feels kind of… re-assuring?

well anyway, i think they were selling it for 6 or 7 bucks, which is cheaper than you’ll get it from me, so… bargain-hunters, get on it. it could be easy to find because i moved it to the front of the cd rack. yes! thats the kind of lame narcissistic thing i would do!

and you know what, for the record, if you ever buy a faux pas record from me and you hate it - get in touch! 30 day money back guarantee.

lastly, a missy-related curio from a few years back… andrew broder (aka fog) re-imagined certain hip hop a capellas back in the day on a couple of cd-rs he put out called “andrew broder’s modern music.” you can still order them as well as a whole bunch of other cool things - ie fog records and t-shirts - at his website.

“things being stuff….”

MP3: Andrew Broder - Gossip Folks